Archive for the ‘Poetry’ Category
I don't know where
All of the world is nothing,
life is war,
you arent here and cant see
what this life is doing to me
the skin is the same
everthing else has shifted.
you may see the one you know
but you dont know him,
hes gone, replaced with me
can you learn to love through loss
let go of him and hold me.
We look the same, but we arent
there is so much to share with you
without a place to start
hold my hand,
please
this hurts
Leaving You
it’s been so long neglected friend
since my hand held you
moving into your seductive curves
that won’t soon be forgotten
etched silhouettes upon my mind
wondering why we left this
leaving un-lived moments prematurely
there was promise with you
now fading from eternity
don’t believe you weren’t loved
you were, you are
I’ve been busy but that isn’t it
time can be made
I would’ve made time
flowers find time to bloom
opening themselves to the world
reveling fragrance and symmetry
inspiring generations to hold them
noticing their everything
my jealousy stems from this, my inability
remembering why we left this
unable to group words into fragrance
stanzas lacking symmetry
no on admires these words
not doing justice to her
so I left you, praying to bloom
at least for her, at least once.
Poetry: From France 3/3
ink exemplifies
slowly flowing from within
your love fills my heart
starting as the pen touches paper,
the ink exemplifying love
| I never knew now have felt |
through hands lifting my eyes
to look only upon you
in an instant I’ll understand
a life of waiting, with hope.
these eyes have seen beauty
| fields of wind swept grain sun kissed snow swept peaks radiating sunsets skimming sea |
eyes left unprepared for a moment
that started when pen touched paper
ink exemplifying the love
the beauty I see in you.
7/4/04 / paris, france
To be with you is to be Home
Moment by Moment my life goes past,
| spent missing you, who I live for spent dreaming here of the moment we?ll touch spent quietly waiting for that instant |
The instant making my moments worth while
| Then I’ll be home. |
Your everywhere I am in everything I see,
| bringing closed eyes back to you bringing soft smiles, warming my heart bringing dreams of that final place, |
the place where we’ll finally embrace
| Then I’ll be home. |
My essence pains at your distance,
| longing to feel your comfort longing for your embrace longing till the moment |
the moment that will start our forever
| Then I’ll be home. |
7/4/04 / paris, france
What I’m scared to say
Fluttering lights flicker past
Windows streaked by rain
Tonight as the sun sets
Hidden behind confused clouds
Ringing themselves into nothing
As horns sound in the distance
Turning my eyes to streaks
Drips who glide so consistently
Its rhythm sends my mind.
Away, back to you
Thoughts suddenly flood in
Remembering nights alone with hope
Warmth resonating from your eyes
Caring from afar
| how you pick me up from the May storm i long to forget? |
You were there, so now I smile.
As the sun finally sets
My hand caresses the switch
Lights go out leaving a void
Darkness creeps in with a chill
It?s cold, I?m cold
| where are you come here i need you please, |
| I love you |
| please…. |
| thank you. |
7/4/04 / paris, france
Poetry: From France 2/3
Warmed by Truth
The fate of the world
slowly turns while tilting
closer to ultimate misfortune
into darkness
setting on the hearts
of a cold lost people
desiring to love
unable to feel
| complete |
living around a world
whose passions aren’t pure
tainted over time
through eyes un-opened
hearts scared to try
minds scared to believe
set upon hollow hope
never will
| satisfy |
the message has come
meeting people with frozen hearts
warmed by the hearth of truth
slowly warmth of love
bring strength
that causes them to know
the one who sent
| his message |
6/13/04 / toulouse, france
Into the Night
slowly, softly the sunlight sets
into twilight stretching thin
as hours of anticipation
leave minutes of serenity
with lights gently glistening
across the Garonne
clouds so sparse, dotted, thin
barley noticeable, gentle wind
distant roar of water falling
stars slowly trace the sky
moments of worry pass away
time should wait, moment long
wait until my soul rest
days gone wry seagulls fly
| into the night |
that forgot to delay
6/14/04 / toulouse, france
Occitania
broken children stumble drunk,
loosing step while river runs
spiritually deserted, dark souls
admire past accomplishments
their beautiful city
masking ugly lost lives
still children stumble drunk
not knowing their father
whose tears flow down
raining upon this town
they don umbrellas
avoiding living water
extinguishing lights, living blind
in darkness
6/22/04 / toulouse, france
Poetry: From France 1/3
Why am I Here
| quietly approaching through the wondering of a lost soul, the alleys and valleys of a dry heart, is a love not yet accepted |
| not yet ignored |
| for when will the door open only a sliver to allow light, only a second for eternity, to reveal the grace of love |
| grace of God |
| overwhelm the body to its knees crying out pain of lives impure crying out praises to the lord desiring to know more of his forgiveness |
| of his grace |
| so we beg to serve him today praying that they will be useful praying to repay a priceless gift that has already been paid in full |
| been given |
| for when will their guidance arrive reveal and show the door |
| let me know |
| to supply encouragement and love until wide swing the arms of beauty |
| arms of love |
| 5/30/04 / toulouse, france |
Creeps Ever Closer
torn, tattered I’m left alone
sitting while wondering
thoughts turn cold
the world darkens
feeling flutters helplessly
as it topples
slowly yet confidently
till there’s nothing
left in me.
darkness creeps ever closer
my heat evades it’s encroach
cooling body to mind
then it all stops
Suddenly,
without prompting
life stands still?
nature halts for this
hands caressing mid-flight rain
as the lord gently
calms, caresses, cares
for his son living his will
best he can
in a dark world.
6/13/04 / toulouse, france
Slowly Falling Away
sinking quietly away
through sands unseen
to anyone but me
this life I live day by day
takes everything to stay
till it will topple over
| suffocating, up to down. |
mixed with confusion and pain
turn to the open embrace
the one whose never left
a father in heaven who reigns
forever, perfectly loving his child
who’ll always fall short
| his love and glory |
his gift of grace to much
to accept or understand
till memories of him
flood my heart once again.
6/13/04 / toulouse, france
Poetry: Thorn
| Thorn a thorn stuck my side sitting in awkward comfort wanting to loose it I touched myself seeking for a mark left the protruding hook fingers waiting…ready realization strikes lost hands misled movable extremities cautiously extend, silent vision goes dark, it moves, you move open eyes reveal solitude mind reveals reality with one traceless thorn pulled in by a heart mind screams to stop dribble ineffective apologies inconsolable thoughts a heart you touched that won’t embrace or cease grasping you 10/5 |
Twilight So often over looked, she stands shy of shadows while light skims across the sky, hoping to expose what darkness hides in those moments within that brief time 2/19 |
it’s interesting to see how things have changed, or rather not changed at all. While the style is different (hopefully matured?) the subject stays the same. The one dream I can’t get myself to let go of. A reality that I know exists yet can’t completely comprehend. I know you’re there and while I want to know it, I know that I can’t. My most sincere regrets are that I can’t explain this, but I understand that in time it will grow into something when the mind and heart finally understand. It seems to be a matter of time. Know that you are worth, and I will wait, all the time that there could ever be.
I placed Twilight to the right (not that it isn’t already on here somewhere) but just to show a comparison of my style after seven months and some change when writing about a similar subject. While I was actually writing about myself in twilight the purpose was the same. To get out on paper something I couldn?t express using things that can’t express them, but making them. To that ends I think thorn is more effective? If you could please let me know what you think of ‘thorn’ I would be very grateful, also kind of wondering who reads this!
Seek out the Face of Christ,
~paul
Poetry: What I’m scared to say
Fluttering lights flicker past
Windows streaked by rain
Tonight as the sun sets
Hidden behind confused clouds
Ringing themselves into nothing
As horns sound in the distance
Turning my eyes to streaks
Drips who glide so consistently
Its rhythm sends my mind.
Away, back to you
Thoughts suddenly flood in
Remembering nights alone with hope
Warmth resonating from your eyes
Caring from afar
how you pick me up
from the May storm
i long to forget?
You were there, so now I smile.
As the sun finally sets
My hand caresses the switch
Lights go out leaving a void
Darkness creeps in with a chill
It?s cold, I?m cold
where are you
come here
i need you
please,
I love you
please?
thank you.
7/4/04 – Paris, France
Poetry: The Future
The Future
My soul longs for words to say,
For direction to show the way,
To find comfort in this place
The world revolves within its grove,
For me it doesn?t seem to move,
No matter how hard I try.
It’s adorn me with no face,
This cold world and quickened pace,
What I?d give for a shimmer of grace.
I’ve hung on as long as I can,
Only wondering where you’ve been,
In short time it will happen.
What I don’t know,
But I’m not willing to go.
/paul prins 9-5-03
To see the words I wrote a year ago, to feel the emotion and pain that was so evident in my life them. Looking to where I sought refuge from it all. I can’t help but be filled with praise for these words, for finding them today and how they effected my outlook on tomorrow and the future. It took me several more months after I wrote this to really understand what I was desiring and seeking. Nearly four months to the day I filled out my application to spend the summer in France, seven and a half months later I applied to be the evangelism team leader, eight months later I was the team leader, and I could keep going. I spent so much time seeking out different things to satisfy me. That would cure my need for grace and love. I exhausted myself looking and searching everywhere I knew too. When I went to rest I was caught up into the arms of Christ.
Thank you father for taking me when I didn’t dare utter your name and for showing me the world which you died for. Thank you for giving me your life, may I live it until I no longer can and meet you face to face.
keep living His blessing,
~paul
Poetry: Red Sand
Red Sand
The tide has gone out to sea
taken everyone but me.
So I sit here alone and cold,
staring at the moon
longing for you to hold.
Night breaks into day,
everything still at bay.
I shutter with that warmth
as fingers dig into open wounds
left by you.
Pretending to hang on
before you had left and gone.
Salt water now burns my flesh
in the wounds you left.
Leaving me sitting on blood stained sand
waiting for someone who’ll understand
the pain of the sea
you caused me.
~paul prins 8/13/03
It’s an amazement to me how there can be such polar emotions over a single action or event. Such love and hate rolled together, bewilderment and confounding thoughts. This poem is the second part of the previous poem, Like a Blue Bird. I really don’t have much else to say right now.
Poetry: Like a Blue Bird
If a blue bird could sing
a song as sweet,
As the one you did,
when you spoke to me.
Maybe I would learn,
hang on every note and word,
to later silently relive
the beauty of what was heard.
But like the bird you left
filling my heart with regret,
leaving me sitting here
remembering what I’ll never forget.
Thinking about that night
when we talked till three,
how the skies opened up
poured out tears with me.
Thinking about that night
when we came to our end
How we both cared so much
yet didn’t try to mend
Thinking about that night
with our final hug,
torn and tattered hearts
slowly unfreezing time
with burning desire to understand
~paul prins 9/10/03
Life is constantly teaching us lessons; there are lessons that we leap out of the gate to share with others and then those dark secretive lessons. The ones that are taught to a part of us that we wish not to expose to the world and they end up shut inside out minds longing for an avenue to experience and enlighten. So often we’ll experience such polar emotions, our bodies broken so sharply that the simplistic and slightest shift brings out a beast we are striving to suppress. We make a decision to take a side of this internal conflict, this war raging through the fiber of our understanding and comprehension that allows us to suppress the other.
Every now and then the suppressed scream so loud that it resonates through your mind and thoughts till you have to allow it a similar appearing avenue to travel, except where no one will ever witness it. Where you will allow it to become feeling expressed to four cold hard walls and a pen whose scribbling motion longs to transcend the indescribable. It’s now been at least seven months since we parted ways, since I raged my hate through a pen into words hoping to cure my pain and hate (which I realize I haven’t posted here, or had and then deleted, so I’ll post that later).
This is what was suppressed, I longed for no one to see me and feel as if I still cared the world for her. I didn’t understand how I could and these words and emotions came out, leaving me so confused. Since then I’ve had the chance to grow and realized that you can be on both sides of the fence, I could deeply love someone and detest them at the same time. Here are my positive sentiments, the later will come with next entry tomorrow.
Take care and God bless,
~paul prins